I grew up in a one burro town. It was so small we didn’t even qualify for a horse. If you weren’t into Mexican polka music or Spanish cometary on soccer, you only had one choice of radio station. For a music aficionado, such as myself, it was torture. I know more Carpenters songs by heart that any person under the age of 60 should ever know. So bad was the play list that to this day I’m often haunted by visions of Muskrat Love.
The one thing that was worth listing to though was the weekly re-airing of Art Linkletter’s “Kids Say the Darnedest Things”. I don’t care who you were, you couldn’t help but laugh your ass off when Mr. Linkletter asked a 7 year old boy “What does your Daddy do for fun?” and the kid replied “He drinks beer and curses at the TV”. We’d all cast a knowing glance at our dad as we giggled until our sides hurt.
Last week the world lost Art Linkletter. Not a sad day, the man really lived a full life. Still I felt compelled to connect with him again. So I dug out an old copy of one of his books to say a proper goodbye. It was great. The next day it was as though my five year old somehow knew this and chose to give me a live action replay of one of Art’s shows. It went something like this…
Mr. Man: “Mom, you know when we read those Skippyjon Jones books?”
Me: “Sure” (how could I forget we read at least 2 a DAY!)
Mr. Man: “Mom, you know when Los Chimichangos tell Skippyjon he has a Muy Big Brain?”
Me: “Sure sweetie I do. That’s one of your favorite lines in that book.”
Mr. Man: “Mom, you have a Muy Big Brain!”
Me: “Oh thanks dude” (I say in my best Spanish accent much like Skippyjon would)
Mr. Man: “Mom, do you have to have a muy big butt like you to have a muy big brain too? Because I want a big brain but I don’t think I can get a butt as big as you”
Me: (coughing and gagging) “No sweetie the size of your butt has nothing to do with the size of your brain”
Mr. Man: “Then why do you keep your butt so big?”
LOVELY! And a fitting homage to Art Linkletter. I now leave you with a rousing rendition of Muskrat Love like only The Captain and his Tennille can do. May you be as scarred as I am.