“Curiouser and curiouser”, wraps up my thoughts after having attended the BlogHer ’10 conference in NYC this past weekend. Let me start off by saying that, much like Alice, I’ve pretty much been napping when it comes to the larger blogging community. Until October of last year I had no clue that BlogHer, Blog World Expo, Blogalicious, Blissdom, Type-A Mom, or any other of the multitudes conferences out there for people who blog, even existed. As for the “royal court” of the blog word, once again I was snoozing (hello I’ve got four kids it’s freaking exhausting). So I went into the weekend with Alice’s sort of doe-eyed wonder mixed with a bit of anxiety.
“That’s the effect of living backwards,” the Queen said kindly: “it always makes one a little giddy at first—–”
I was a lucky girl. I was invited to a number of “private” parties (mostly due to the bionic eyelash power of my real life friend and BlogHer roomie Bailey aka Makeover Momma). I jumped at every invite like a worn out cliche. I was the dorky girl turned into impossible beauty -as if-, in every poorly written teen romance flick you’ve ever watched. I was gonna show Lance Hicks that he was SO wrong when he ignored me in 9th grade! In retrospect I realize, he’s now a balding has-been longing for his “glory days” and all I really wanted was to spend time with people I dig… like the Babble Staff, and The Music Mamas. Running around from party to party like…well… um… you fill in the blank there, gave me sore feet, a huge cab tab and dredged up more than a few social anxiety issues I thought I’d long put the kibosh on. It did NOT help that several of the events had a “system” for bestowing swag (which was nice but I could have done without most of it).. if you were a “plus one”, or showed up a tad tardy you were pretty much in the -“YOU’RE LATE FOR TEA!”- timeout corner . Lets be honest here people, unless Johnny Depp is waiting there offering up his lap for you to sit on, it SUCKS!
Alice laughed, “There’s no use trying,” she said, “one can’t believe impossible things.”
I found the combination of the “C-list” celeb -Bruce Jenner, really?!- laden and swag schlepping Expo Hall to be a sensory overload. Don’t get me wrong I’ll use it as bribe material forever treasure the photo booth pictures of Scary Mommy, Music Savvy Mom, my roomies Savoring The Thyme, Makeover Momma and I making fish faces a la 6th grade. The look on the face of The Sun (of Jimmy Dean infamy) when I asked him if he hated his agent… priceless! So how would I have done it were I The Queen.. well first off there would have been flamingo croquette to be sure… in all seriousness though I would have loved to actually talk to people who blogged. How can a brand do that you say? Well most of them have ambassadors these days, or communities, some even have blogs. Those are the brand folk I’d have liked to talked to. Honestly what do a 20-something-80-pound-just-out-of-college-very-nice-but-VERY-young PR rep and I have in common? I doubt they actually use that vacuum cleaner they are telling me about let alone know how to get a dozen freaking Silly Bandz out of the dam thing!
“You may look in front of you, and on both sides, if you like,” said the Sheep; “but you can’t look all round you – unless you’ve got eyes at the back of your head.”
I thought I could do it all.. expo, parties, sessions and enjoying my one of my favorite cities. When I couldn’t, the guilt was overwhelming. Guilt.. really? Yup.. guilt. But why? On some small level I feel responsible that there were people I missed or only got time to air kiss. I know it’s insane to think I could do it all.. but not getting to those people makes me feel like I’ve failed to give those relationships the time I wanted to. Did I look stuck up? Gosh I hope NOT! That I even worry about that is both narcissistic and neurotic.. two of my least favorite “N”s to be. Unlike my other roomie and real life personal cheerleader and bestie.. Jennifer (Hip As I Wanna Be) I didn’t make it to a single session and I haven’t returned home with a renewed vigor and sparkly new focus for my blog. Blogger Fail!
That said I’m still glad I went. Why? Because now I know. Before I didn’t. I felt left out and clueless.. now I’ve been included and I’m still clueless and guess what.. I’m sort of okay with that. For me blogging is a way to work things out.. after all “I have four kids and an opinion”.. maybe you want to hear it, maybe you don’t, but my passion is in the fact that it’s my blog.. my dream.. and I’m sort of digging this Wonderland.