Few holidays are more contrived than the annual Commercialization d’Amore known as Valentine’s Day. I wonder if martyred St. Valentine himself – also the patron Saint of Beekeepers and Epilepsy, who knew? – would have had second thoughts about marrying those Christians and Roman soldiers forbidden martial bliss, had he known that centuries later his name would be attached to a day of obligatory cheap chocolates, cheesy baubles, and forced sentimentality.
Does it sound like I’m down on love?
Not. At. All.
In fact, I’m quite the hopeless romantic, prone to bouts of bad poetry and rambling love letters. Sonnet? I’m on it. (see, it’s pretty bad)
So what is my beef? Why am I again up on my well-worn soapbox? Believe it or not, it has nothing to do with receiving my annual cheap chocolate. Yes, I get it too ladies. What got me was watching a package on ABC World News last night (in 2014) in which the Roving Reporter slogged through the slick, soggy, icy and quite frankly, dangerous streets of Manhattan to deliver a ginormous bouquet of roses.
In the piece our valiant delivery guy hands over they flora to the beaming woman, exclaiming, “Someone loves you. Happy Valentine’s Day.”
The door closes and the story goes on to chronicle the many Florists on the East Coast dealing with the dilemma of making deliveries in time for Valentine’s Day amid the storm’s aftermath. This story followed a feature on the treacherous conditions caused by the storm that had ravaged a swath of the country ranging from the South to the North East.
I’m currently living through what the storm dumped, and I’ve gotta tell ya it was a nasty bugger.
The takeaway here folks was essentially this, if the overpriced flowers, cheap chocolates, environmentally dangerous Mylar balloons and/or cheesy stuffed animals don’t get delivered ON or before February 14th, YOUR LOVE IS INVALID.
Who cares about the safety of those delivering said “love”, or those who might love them… get the damn flowers there on time or my relationship is a sham!
My challenge to you is a boycott of this type of Valentine’s Day in favor of honoring True Love (yes, I said that in my best Princess Bride voice-over)
Do something from the heart, do it today. Maybe then also support those LOCAL Florists (ugh, one more box of mail-order sad looking flowers and I’m going to find a goat to feed them to) on a random Tuesday for no reason other than you love her/him and you want them to know it.
Here are a few ideas for a NON-Commercialization D’Amore, that just might help you… um… score. wink
- Write a love letter
- Take care of the one chore they hate doing most
- Make a meal, with your own two hands (seriously it’s not that hard there are a TON of blogs out there with simple recipes. Or heck, pop for one of those meal delivery kits.
- Rent -or stream- a classic flick that you both dig. Get some wine, snacks and act like you’re in high school all over again. Only without the insecurity and bad skin, ya know.
- Go with the bad poetry, it works.
- Play a game of Twister and do shots. You’re over 21, doesn’t mean you have to act like it. Let go, have fun!
- Plan a getaway together. When you do that it allows you both to find things you each want to do and takes away some of that pressure to make it “perfect”.
- Make a “mixtape”. Spotify is great for this. Put together songs that mean something to the both of you and then… DANCE!
Who needs Valentine’s Day anyway? Up with love every damn day!
note: this is a post first written in 2014 and now updated for 2019, meaning I pretty much just changed graphics because it’s still snow and also this shit is timeless advice, yo!