Today I impart upon you, my loyal Nuggetiers, some of the “nuggets” of wisdom I’ve learned in my 38 years at this party called “Life”.
1. Don’t ever warm your wet, just showered, butt by the glow of a wood burning stove. Lest you drop your towel and get 2nd degree burns on said nether region. No matter what your age it just doesn’t do your social status any favors to turn up in public with an inflatable butt donut to sit on.
2. Three year olds are the only people that can get away with stripping naked to take a pee. Yes I’ve tried this, don’t judge.
3. Squirrels are a deceptively savvy adversaries. (proof Here, Here and here)
4. I am NOT as cool as I think I am.. just ask my teenager he’ll tell ya.
5. No matter what you tell yourself, YES all the other people in your yoga class DID hear you pass gas. And trying to pass it off as “working on your digestive health” doesn’t fly.
6. Where ever five or more chic chicks gather I will inevitably be the one with toilet paper stuck to my shoe.
7. Coffee is indeed the sixth food group. Nutella the seventh.
8. Beauty can be found in everyday life if you only look for it (I suggest Sephora).
9. A picture, even of me, is truly worth a thousand words. Many of which I would put my kids on time out for saying.
10. It’s your blog, say and do what YOU want! RESPECT THE BLOG!!!
YEAH for the end of SUMMER!!!! I’m doing my blogosphere FAMOUS “Shake U Hiney it’s SO FINE E” dance, seen below.
And NO my sheer blissful joy at seeing TWO of my FOUR kids climb on the bus to be chauffeured away for the next 7 hours does NOT make me a bad mom! I do my best not to judge others. That said though, if I have to read one more word about how “Oh I’m going to miss them. My playmates are gone. It will be so quiet around here I’ll feel lost!” blah, blah, blah… haaa-bull-shit! (gasuntight)…
HOORAY for education, peace and getting to my Yoga class! If you still have a little one or two at home and you’re forced to, I don’t know.. FEED them. Stop by Cheapskate Mom’s pad. She is running a FABU contest. ONE MONTH OF FREE BABY FOOD… made by the lovely Mr. Tyler Florence himself!
Hey Nuggetiers! Today is “supposed” to be the first day of our new Nugget schedule.. and wouldn’t you know I already effed that up?!!! Geez sometimes I think I need a brain rack next to the umbrella rack so I can remember where the hell I left the dam thing!!
Today you can “find” me over at Hip As I Wanna Be doing a guest post pop quiz style for Jenn while that BEE-HATCH is off living La Vida Disney in Florida. Stop by and see which celeb I’m hanging all over!